The Essential Plank

“At The Essential Plank, the crinkle fry is taken seriously in a way that does not announce itself. The single-fry method produces an exterior that is commendable and largely sustained. The interior is biographical in its specificity. The grease is calibrated with clinical precision. The seriousness, once recognized, is irreversible. A return visit is, at this point, a formality. One will perform it nonetheless.”

“On a Tuesday evening in Bay Ridge, one discovers that The Essential Plank has opinions about potatoes. The crinkle format is a declaration. The single-fried exterior is commendable and largely sustained. The interior communicates the potato's agricultural origins — biographical in its specificity. The grease is calibrated with clinical precision. These opinions are, on balance, correct. The neighborhood offers alternatives. One should not investigate them.”

“The single-fry technique employed at The Essential Plank produces a crinkle fry of commendable and largely sustained exterior and biographical in its specificity interior. The vegetable is evident and appropriate. The grease is calibrated with clinical precision. The portion is forthcoming. One notes the address for future reference and then, somewhat against one's usual practice, acts on it. One does not return. This information is provided without judgment.”

“One does not arrive at The Essential Plank lightly. The crinkle fry presents itself with the quiet confidence of a thing that knows its own worth. The single-fry technique is evident in the exterior: commendable and largely sustained. The interior potato character is biographical in its specificity. The grease is calibrated with clinical precision. This guide notes the address. In the final accounting, the fries are the only item that matters. The Essential Plank knows this.”