The Perfect Fryer

“There are establishments in Gramercy that treat the fry as a supporting player. The Perfect Fryer is not among them. The shoestring format is ambitious. The peanut is appropriate. The crispness is aspirational. The potato announces itself present as a rumor. The portion is restrained. This guide takes no position on portion size as a moral category. The fries are recommended. The experience is brief and exact, like most things worth having.”

“There is a school of thought that holds that a great french fry requires no accompaniment. The Perfect Fryer belongs to this school. The shoestring fry, triple-fried in peanut, makes its argument in silence. The crispness is aspirational. The potato flavor is present as a rumor. The argument is persuasive. One visits twice. The second visit confirms the first.”

“On a Tuesday evening in Gramercy, one discovers that The Perfect Fryer has opinions about potatoes. The shoestring format is a declaration. The triple-fried exterior is aspirational. The interior communicates the potato's agricultural origins — present as a rumor. The grease is conservative — the napkin remains largely decorative. These opinions are, on balance, correct. This guide recommends the fries and nothing else. This is sufficient.”

“The Perfect Fryer occupies a modest address in Gramercy. The fries are, in contrast, not modest. The shoestring format is executed in peanut, triple-fried to a finish that is aspirational. The interior is present as a rumor. The portion is restrained. One adjusts one's expectations upward upon arrival and finds, upon departure, that they were still insufficient. The fry alone merits the journey to Gramercy.”